Madames et Monsieurs, la naine rouge dix!

Kryten: Sirs, I have an announcement to make, it’s really very exciting.

Cat: Eeeeow, I love excitment bud!

Kryten: Indeed sir, and this may require some very smart clothing items

Rimmer: Get on with it man.

Kryten: Yes sir sorry sir. Red Dwarf X has been nominated, it hasn’t won but it has been nominated for a little award at the 53rd Festival de Television de Monte Carlo. 

Lister: Hey, that sounds well posh that does. Who’s Monte Carlo?

Kryten: It’s a geaographic location sir, a Principality on the Mediterranean Coast of France founded in 1866 by Charles the third of Monaco and now best known as a tax haven and international centre for gambling.

Lister: Hey, that sounds well posh that does.

Rimmer: They’re hardly likely to let you in Lister, you’d lower the tone.

Lister: Hey, I’ve got tone Rimmer, I’ve got tone coming out me finger tips. When’s this Monto thing happening Kryts?

Kryten: June the 9th to the 13th sir, we’re sadly 3 million light years away so I fear we may miss the event.

Lister pics up Guitar and starts singing lonesome blues song. Rimmer holovomits. Cat re-enters, he’s already changed into something lurid and appropriate.